Day 17: Self-Compassion

Welcome to 40 Days of Mindfulness and Compassion Day 17!

 

Lecture

 We have worked some with equanimity and kindness, and now will begin to explore compassion.  Compassion is often as defined as the wish for suffering to not be there. If I am experiencing compassion for someone, at least on some level, I am wanting for their suffering to be alleviated.

This may sound simple and straightforward, but compassion is quite counterintuitive. We are largely habituated to not experience compassion. When encountering suffering, either our own or someone else’s, two common and instinctual responses are either to be overcome and overwhelmed by it or to resist it. Compassion, on the other hand and to a large degree, is a balance between these two.

My own definition that I sometimes employ is that compassion is the ability to be with difficulty in a caring and sustained way. We don’t turn away and we are not overcome. We are able to be with it, and to respond in a caring and affectionate manner.

Here, we begin the by exploring self-compassion. Self-compassion is a very important and recent concept. It involves a particular way of self-relating that most of us were never taught. When I first encountered self-compassion practices, I was quite resistant to them. I avoided the practices and minimized their importance. Once, I jumped in, I did not for a while believe that the practices “were doing anything.” And then, I began to notice results in daily life.

So, let us begin with a gentle self-compassion practice.

 

Meditation Tips

Meditation Tip #18: If a practice involves imagery, the process is the same as with other practices: Just gently do the practice and do not expect any particular effect (i.e a visual response). Think of it as imagination rather than visualization. We all know what it is like to imagine. Tap into the imagination and “see what happens.” We all imagine in different ways.

Meditation Day 17: Self-Compassion (15 Minutes)

 

Self-Reflective Activity

Try to pause periodically throughout the day during your daily activities. Just pause and breathe for a bit, then very gently look at your current experience. Ask yourself: “How is my experience right now? Observe and gently note what is there. If any difficulty is there, send yourself a message of self-compassion by silently reciting to yourself: “May I be free of this difficulty.”